Peace in the Midst of Failure
I let a friend down this weekend... The plans were concrete in her head but they were not in my mind and I made the mistake of not clarifying and clearly making sure we were or were not doing something.
Thankfully we dealt with the issue like adults and talked out what went down. But I still felt that familiar pang of frustration as I processed through the fact that I had disappointed a friend. My constant striving to seem perfect was thwarted, yet again. Anyone else out there still struggling with that silly lie? That you can actually be perfect and that all relationships will always go well and people will never see your dark side? No? Just me? Damn.
As I was in the midst of feeling frustrated and down on myself for bailing on my friend, I had a wonderful realization and I breathed a sigh of relief...My failure to be a perfect friend actually allowed me to feel like a human/ real person. The person I let down saw the imperfect side of me and she stuck around. Even though it was painful, my failure actually allowed me to feel closer to her and I think our friendship grew as a result of it.
There is peace in being imperfect and I am learning to accept the sides of me that are not shiny and bright. Real friendship and relationships grow from seeing and accepting the not so pretty sides. You can read all you want about that fact, you can listen to Brene Brown all you want, but you will not be able to truly understand the reality of relationships until you live them.
Keep it real this week and see what happens. Happy Monday, you're not perfect but you are pretty great.